You’re crushing it 99% of the time, but that tiny 1% whispers:
“What if they find out you’re a fraud?”
I used to be the queen of it. Working crazy long hours, rarely delegating. Always feeling one step away from being “exposed” as not good enough.
Using deliberate ambiguity to camouflage a lack of confidence and insecurity: If no one could pin down exactly what I knew, they couldn’t prove I didn’t belong.
I didn’t want to sound stupid in front of peers… I was the boss, so I should know everything… I was waiting …to be found out.
When I put a name to it, it’s feeling overwhelmed.
And if I’m being honest with myself, I was also a touch scared. Scared of what ‘failure’ would say about me.
What I didn’t realise then, was that I was wrestling with something millions experience:
Imposter Syndrome.
Telling yourself (or someone else…) to “just get over it” is the opposite of helpful.
The game-changer?
Understanding it. Naming it. Conquering it.
I went from constantly second-guessing myself, to helping clients break through their own invisible barriers.
Because that’s what they are: self imposed barriers we have no idea we are constructing.
As a coach, I’ve seen leaders behave the same:
→ Overwork
→ Under delegate
→ Doubt their ability
→ Set unrealistic pedestal-like goals for themselves
→ Are perfectionists, so need to check everything
→ Use deliberate ambiguity, to camouflage insecurity.
And, a resistance to see it as a problem that can be fixed.
I’ve seen transformations, such as from a recent client:
“…having tried for years to get rid of my gremlins(negative thoughts) I have learnt to manage and put them to the side.”
If you’ve found yourself with Imposter Syndrome, or waiting ‘to be found out’, this is how you conquer it.
Keep a log/journal of achievements.
It can be as basic as you like and works in two ways.
First, it reminds you that you’re doing good work and that you are capable.
Second, it provides a that you can show your boss at your next review.
(Lets face it, you’re probably not telling them…)
Stop perfectionism, with time blocking and boundaries
Combat perfectionism by establishing clear boundaries and deadlines. Time blocking prevents overthinking, those endless revisions and need to do ‘just one edit’.
Set realistic time limits for tasks and stick to them.
Not feeling good enough/ anxious?
There are a few psychological techniques to calm your mind.
- Practice the psychological sigh (a deep breath technique)
- Take a fifteen-minute walk outside
- Consciously replace negative thoughts with positive affirmations, as soon as you’re aware they are happening
- Practice mindfulness by engaging your senses: what do I see, hear, feel?
Stop comparing yourself
Easy to say, but we all have our own journey, and your personal development matters more than where others are. Shift your focus from external comparisons to personal growth.
Your achievement journal becomes a powerful tool here, allowing you to track your progress over time.
Challenge “I’m not good enough” thoughts
When self-doubt emerges, use this four-step process:
- Identify the specific skill or area causing your doubt
- Examine the root of why you believe you’re not good enough
- Analyse how this belief manifests in your behaviour
- Gather concrete evidence that directly contradicts this negative belief
I use this for any limiting belief I have that pops up.
Remind yourself of your achievements, especially during transitions– your promotion wasn’t a mistake.
List the great things you’ve accomplished, and understand that your success is a result of your skills and hard work.
Try one that feels relevant, and let me know how you get on.
Have an epic week,
Lesley x